Awaiting the answers...

So many questions with out answers. Searching for some one to answer them. I have asked, emailed and left with disappointment. When your leadership fails you, where do you turn. In all actuality, at this point its the principle of the matter.

Waiting for answers, looking for direction.

The reasoning...

I embarked on this "Journey without college" hoping for something to hit me. Something to move me. Something to tough me and make me feel passion for something. Volunteering didn't seem to work out. I looked and asked and know one really seemed that interested. I guess thats a closed door. I'm trying to learn when to realized when something is a close door. FRUSTRATING! I have decided to take this time and research different majors and jobs. Every time I seem to find a major I am interested in, it isnt offered in this area. We are definitely not in the position to move right now. So that means I am limited to what is offered around me.

Criminal Psychology with a minor in Linguistics would be my ideal major. That would mean Denver for us. I just don't think that is going to happen.

Ill have to figure something out here.... Keep looking. Keep search.

The reasoning behind this decision being so hard is I do not just want a job. I want to make a difference. I want to be somebody not just everybody. I want to make an impact some where some how. Is that such a bad thing? I just don't think social work is for me any more. After doing some searching, it is a great degree but i dont think i could sleep at night knowing that i would just help people in bad situations instead of preventing it.

I guess that means something in the criminal justice field. I want something federal though. Which is hard core to get into....


Praying for something to help me stand apart.


I have a feeling im getting closer to what i want though!! :) thats always a good set! :)

Baby Steps

I contacted my loan company! It went better then I though. I am on a 6 month grace period with my student loans! Things are really on the right track. I found an amazing organization to volunteer at. It's called YWCA ! Very excting.

It's one thing to feel called a certain direction, it's another to watch it all fall in place. Ita amazing how easy things are when God has already paved the path for you. Not saying there won't be challenges , but when the challenges arise, it doesn't feel quite as overwhelming then when you try succeed on your own.

This is all definetly a learning time in my life. I'm learning to be a wife, and how to live on my own. This is a huge opportunity for me to grow!

<3 Kayla!

But I have raised you up for this purpose, that I might show you my power and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth.
Exodus 9:9

Living

I have been going to school for 15 years of my life now. Every fall brings new pens, notebooks, books and teachers. That is how it has always been, for as long as I can remember. I just turned 20, and should be starting my Junior year of college. But I'm left thinking why I went in the first place. I am a planner, list maker, and over thinker. Everything I do, I make sure has a purpose and is planned out with every T crossed and I dotted. Well, I'm tired of that. I went to college because that was what I was supposed to do. So for the last 2 years I have wrestled with the "picking a major" issue that every student seems to struggle with. But it made me think, if I knew what I wanted to major in, it would make this whole college experience relevant.

So, I have made a decision that is right for me. For once it's not because some one told me to, or because it's what is expected. It is where God is leading me. This fall semester I have decided to take a break. I will live life and hopefully this journey will help me figure out my passion in life. I am leading a small group at church, teaching a Spanish class, working and trying to find volunteering oppertunities to help me figure out Gods plan for me!

Pray for me! This journey will be exciting and fun! I'm ready to see what God does when I don't have a plan, but just follow instead.

Jeramiah 29: 11
For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.